His ears were lowered!

And he was mad because he couldn't get his plastic CD out of his toy CD player. Oh, to be a child again with worries such as these!

Just a picture

I love this little guy.

Think about this...

I found this on a friend's blog today and thought I would pass it along. Hope it gives you something to think about.

"I was listening to a Christian radio station today and someone shared a 'food for thought' that I found pretty interesting. He said that when a Christian goes through trials and tribulations, when they are having a really tough time in their lives, they either become bitter or better. The only difference in the two is the 'I'."

Just words

I don't have any pictures to post today. Jackson hasn't napped well the past two days at day care so when he is home in the evening, all I can do is get him fed, bathed and in bed. No time for fun picture taking. For the past two nights, he has cried the whole time while in the bathtub. I am not sure what has brought this on. I am "chalking" it up to him being tired, but I really hope there isn't a new fear of water or anything. It really has been bothering me, especially tonight. Nothing would calm him. Nothing... no playing, no singing, no back washing, not even loving on him and trying to calm him. So, I bathed him as quickly as I could and got him out. He seemed to calm a little. Then every once in a while, it would start back up again during his dinner. Yes, tonight, I baked dinner while I bathed him and then fed him after his bath. Usually, we play while dinner is baking and then we bathe after dinner. However, I wanted to get him in bed as soon as possible. I don't like to hear him cry. It hurts my heart and then it really just starts to aggravate me because I don't know what is wrong.

I am sure it was only exhaustion today but I am really worried about the bathtub thing. The only thing I think about in relation to this crying senario is the one time I was talking to his pediatrician about him screaming when I lay him down to change him. This was about 6 months ago (it seems like) and he is still doing it (the screaming and crying) sometimes. The doctor says to me "he is relating his diaper changing to something bad that has happened to him when he was being changed or was laid down". UH HELLO!! Do you realize who you are telling this to? A first time mom. A mom that worries about everything. A mom that would never hurt her child. A mom that now second guesses just about everything she does when it comes to her baby. Maybe I just over reacted and I am sure he really didn't mean any harm, but I just can't shake that conversation.

I really only want what's best for him. I know he will never be perfect, but it really hurts to see him just cry like that.

Wow, this was really more emotional than I expected. I didn't think I would end up sitting in front of this blurred computer screen with tear-filled eyes. I guess I have just had some suppressed emotion about that conversation and it has finally all come out. But, you know what makes it all better? What makes the really hard evenings all better? I wake up in the morning and go in his room with his "brother" and he stands up in his crib and gives me the sweetest smile ever! One that just says "Good morning and I love you". Then he points to a stuffed animal on his shelf and says "OOOOK" through his pacifier telling me to "look". That just wipes all my worries away and makes me melt all over again.

a little behind

So... I am a couple of days behind on my 365 project. well, behind on posting them to the blog but not behind on taking the pictures. I had planned to post these over the last couple of days, but my son decided to pass along the stomach bug to me! UGH! Now, this is the SECOND time I've gotten it! Had to be out of work Monday with a fever and the junk and had to come home today around lunch time. I am actually feeling better now. I think a little food on my belly actually helped. But you know -- there was some good in all of this! I am down 4 pounds!!! :) Yippee! What a good jump start. Now, I just have to keep it going. I feel a difference in that I don't feel so bloated so hopefully that will help me stay on track.

I do have an update about Jackson though. He is not completely walking on his own yet, but he is walking just holding on to one hand. He still gets a little upset when you make him stand on his own. I really think he has a major fear of falling. Because when you let go, he screams. Guess he still is just not ready. It will come. But, I am taking in the accomplishment of using only one hand!

Well, here are two more of my 365:

another mastercard ad

shoe laces: free with new pair of shoes

new shoes: $29.99
oh, to be like daddy: priceless

nine of three hundred and sixty five

Just a few of the items that fill our living room floor on a daily basis. Does the picture look stretched to you because of the date being stretched horizontally? Illusion? Maybe... The picture has not been stretched.

Sick... Sick... Sick...

Have I ever mentioned how I don't "do" vomit very well? (What a way to start this posting, right?) Well, just in case you aren't aware... I don't "do" vomit very well. Get my drift?

Wednesday, Jackson's day care called and said that his fever was a little high. However, not high enough for me to come and get him. He didn't seem too unhappy but he seemed to be a bit clingy. Now, if you know my son, he is the least bit clingy. He is very good about playing and occupying himself. I find this to be a very good trait sometimes -- especially when I have other things to do. I still felt like I really needed to go get him. I wanted him to be able to rest if he wanted to and I wanted to be there for him if he just wanted to cuddle with me since he wasn't feeling the greatest. Yes, I am already cherishing those moments. Of course, when we got home, it seemed as though he was just playing hookie. Didn't seem like anything was wrong, other than he had a temperature. I did give him a bath early and he had a little bit of dinner. Then went to bed right around 7. I decided to take him to the doctor Thursday morning because he did have a snotty nose and sounded really horse. I thought this junk may have something to do with his throat as well as the fact that he is cutting four, yes FOUR, teeth right now.

Doc said he has avirus going around... fever, hacking cough, irritated throat, diarrhea, and vomiting. Well, he had everything except the vomiting. Note the word HAD... Wayne was able to watch him Thursday, so I went back to work. Told him to be careful because of the diarrhea issue and I know just how bad he hates those kinds of diapers. Really... who does though?

Well, Friday morning, I thought I was going to take him back to day care because he didn't have fever at all Thursday and he hadn't thrown up. However, his snotty nose seemed to be worse and his diarrhea hadn't gotten any better... If anything,it was a little worse. So, I just decided to stay home (Wayne needed to sleep because he is working the late shift this weekend). Plus, it would have been nice to get some laundy done while I babyied my little guy. He seemed to be okay for the most of the day. However, after he ate his dinner, while he was still in his chair at the table, everything came back up. Projectile. That is the worst kind. Now, I will say that it all stayed in his chair tray, which was a good thing but it was still hard to clean it up. I guess I also don't need to leave out the fact that my step-mom was with him when this happened. I was at the sink washing dishes. So, this whole experience could have been much worse than it was. But, I just don't do vomit.

He seemed to be much better afterwards. Don't we all? I just hope he doesn't wake up in a few hours -- starving...

Unloading the diswasher

Jackson loves to help with chores around the house. Can't you tell?

update

I took this just after I got my camera. I am not sure what is creating the shadow on the left side of the picture, but it adds a nice touch. I love this little guy! Such a happy baby.

Now, for those of you who want a little GREEN for St. Patty's Day. Here ya go! Just know that Jackson was not playing "muffs"... he was playing peek-a-boo. This was before he knew that he needed to cover his eyes.

Blessings

When I drive, I am finding that is my quiet time to just think, refresh, and do some praying. Of course, it would be the time that I am by myself because kids music is usually blaring when Jackson is in the car. So, I really only have a short time in the morning and the afternoon because work is now not very far from day care.

This morning, I was waiting at a stop light. The thought of yesterday's picture just popped in my head. Knowing the background info on that picture -- Bo was trying to lick Jackson and Jackson was trying to get him away --isn't really what is potrayed with some digital cropping and editing. Picturing the bond between Jackson and Bo really just makes me think sometimes. It makes me think about all the blessings God has given me. I have a husband that is great and loves me with all of his being (even when I get under his last layer of skin). I have a son who I don't think could be a better baby. I have doggie that loves me in any given situations. And I have all the necessities -- shelter, clothing, food, water. I know that I take all of these things for granted way to often. And too often I don't thank the Lord above for all the many blessings in my life. However, I am very thankful for all of these things and so much more.

I will leave you with today's picture. I so much would love to be back at the beach (with my son this time) -- kicked back and relaxing with not a bit of stress.

so the race is on...

the finish line? december 4, 2010. yes, my brother is getting married. i am a bride's maid. the dress has been bought. halter top, empire waist, poofy (but very pretty) skirt. sized at 3 sizes too small for me.

'nough said.

my two sons

I really cannot come up with the best comment for this one. These guys are just so special to me!

Special brothers, I tell ya...

So, if you follow me on Facebook, you have already gotten a glimpse of this one. Yesterday, when Jackson and I got back from running some errands, I was bringing the bags in the house and as I was looking back at the house... this is what I found...

These guys really do love each other -- and their Mommy too! :)

Good Morning, Brother

After I dress and get myself ready on a weekday morning, the next step of my routine is to let Bobo out. He does his business and then runs back to the front door for me to let him back in. I take his leash off and he never lets me forget what is next. Good Morning, Brother! :) After he is released from his leash, he runs to Jackson's bedroom door and waits for me to open it. I have caught him a couple of times tapping the door knob with his nose. (There is true brotherly love between them.)

Yesterday morning, I grabbed my camera in attempt to snap a quick picture of Bobo licking Jackson's hands -- but he was just too quick. So, this is what I ended up with for 3 of my 365. I did add a bit of a brown filter in Photoshop to the picture so, the colors are a bit distorted.

a day late...

BUT Spring is coming! My bushes tell me so!

365

I am very interested in viewing blogs created by photographers -- portrait photographers as well as photographers specializing in scenery or landscapes. The hobbiest who choses to make their photos famous on their blogs are sometimes the most fun to look at. However, that is not the point of this posting. The point: Many times I find bloggers who create "A Year of Photos" on their blog. They begin January 1 to post one of their pictures and post a new one daily. I tell you, this new camera of mine has really inspired me. So... I am going to start a little late, but I will just end late too. Who knows, I may just create a neat little book of all the pictures when my year is done... Here is my 1 of 365:

A quiet morning at the coast.

Say CHEESE!

Marriage Retreat Weekend

Well, before the time passes too much more, I will let you know how our weekend on the marriage retreat was. We actually had a good time. Wayne had reservations in the beginning because he just didn’t know a lot of the people. I am not sure if I mentioned this before, but we went with a group from the church that I grew up in. Yes, we have been visiting this church for a few months now, but Wayne was still very unfamiliar with a lot of the people. We were in a house with 4 other couples. Two of the couples were closer to our age and hadn’t been married quite as long as us. The other 2 were older and had been married a bit longer. I think their years of marriage were 11 and 12, maybe?

Friday night was just a time to get settled in and meet the owners of our bed and breakfast homes and check-in. We did have a time with the whole group as an introduction period and we each discussed 2 things that made our marriages stronger. The pastor spoke a few words of encouragement and then we broke to play games and basically settle for the evening.

Saturday morning, we woke bright and early and had breakfast at our homes around 8. I must say that our home owners were wonderful chefs. Breakfast was one of the highlights of our weekend. For most of the morning, we separated into small groups and had discussions about our marriages and how they can benefit (and possibly break down) the church. This time for Wayne and I was very beneficial. During the second session, we were talking about change in the church and change in general. A lot of the topics dealt directly with some of the changes going on in that church specifically so, Wayne and I just kept quiet. Well, someone spoke up and asked us what we felt about change because we had been kind of quiet. It was then, that Wayne really spoke up about some things that had happened to him in the past and a lot about our spiritual walk. By the end, I really started to get emotional. I am not sure why. I think it was more because of the fact that now someone else knew what we (I) had been feeling. Our spiritual life, covering since the time that we met, was laid on the table – by Wayne. Well, I say “our spiritual life”, but really more-so Wayne’s. I think the tears were more tears of joy and relief that our story was out to these other 3 couples. I also think the relief came because he was telling it. He was opening up.

In response, they gave very good insight to what Wayne was saying. One of the ladies and the lead gentleman followed up at the end of our session and stated that we all needed to think about either mentoring or being a mentor to another couple in the church. It definitely will serve as an accountability partner. Not just for one of the spouses, but for both. If you can’t tell already, I have a very soft and tender heart about our spiritual walk. I tread very lightly when it comes to this matter because my conscience gets to me more about this than anything else. I know there are a lot of things that I need to work on when it comes to my faith. There are things that Wayne and I need to work on together.

** Sidenote: Wow, that was much more than I planned to put into this. But, I guess when the words start going, I just can’t stop! Oh, and it does help to put it out there. I guess this is the start of my “diary” part of this blog. **

For the majority of the remainder of the weekend, Wayne and I spent a lot of time together and walking around New Bern. We took a lot of pictures as well, as you can see from my previous posting. We did have a GREAT time watching a lot of the group learning to square dance Saturday afternoon. Now, that… was a HOOT!

All in all, I am really glad that we took the time to go on this retreat. I think this is the beginning of something special for Wayne and me. He may not think the same right now, but maybe in the future, he will look back on this and then think the same.