(please note: this is a long one!)
Recently, I have had several battles with being content. I believe that this is evident in many of our lives because we are all human, but I have just been severely struggling with it and I believe Wayne has too. I have blogged about our ventures in trying to pay off some debt and that is going well. We both know that we need to get that off of our shoulders and we have been praying that we never allow ourselves to get there again.
However, both of us are striving so hard these days for the next step in life. Wayne really wants a new house – a bigger house. I, most days, would like to have another child soon so that Jackson will not be so much older than his sibling. I know that it is okay to dream. That is healthy for us; we need to strive to have more. However, I find that at times, these two items just consume us. Consume our daily lives and most of our conversations.
On several different occasions Wayne has told me that he is just tired of me talking to him about another baby. He is tired of everyone saying something to him about another child. I told him that I would do better about it but we are in the time in our lives when others are just going to mention it. We are in the childbearing years and that is what people our age talk about.
I was talking to my mom Saturday evening about all of this and that I had been going through these battles internally. I had mentioned that if I have to stop talking about another child and be content with Jackson, then why can’t he (Wayne) be content with the house that we have. Why do I always have to hear about his plans for the new house, what he wanted to do, where he wanted to build at, etc. The response? The wise words from Mom? “DON’T WORRY ABOUT IT!” “Don’t worry about any of it. God, in his perfect timing will provide”. “You will kill each other dealing with this mess.” She is so right.
“Don’t worry about it!” filled my head for the rest of the evening. I have consciously made an effort to quit worry about it. I have prayed that God would help me be content and I have continued to thank him for everything he has provided for us and everything additional that he has allowed us to have.
Yesterday I was driving to get Jackson after work. The thoughts and conversations about all this stuff hadn’t come to my brain so far for the day. However, the radio announcer started introducing the next song… “Waiting Room” by Jonny Diaz (lyrics below)… I had heard this song before and listened to some of the words. However, this time I listened to each word and boy, did it hit home.
God definitely has his perfect plan for our lives. Again, just because Wayne and I want a new house and another child doesn’t mean that we need them right now. God knows what He is doing and if we have to wait a little longer, we need to be happy with that. Even if He tells us no for one of them or both, we have to still continue to praise Him for the blessings that he has given us. There is a reason for every decision that He makes and we must strive to be content with those decisions.
Recently, I have had several battles with being content. I believe that this is evident in many of our lives because we are all human, but I have just been severely struggling with it and I believe Wayne has too. I have blogged about our ventures in trying to pay off some debt and that is going well. We both know that we need to get that off of our shoulders and we have been praying that we never allow ourselves to get there again.
However, both of us are striving so hard these days for the next step in life. Wayne really wants a new house – a bigger house. I, most days, would like to have another child soon so that Jackson will not be so much older than his sibling. I know that it is okay to dream. That is healthy for us; we need to strive to have more. However, I find that at times, these two items just consume us. Consume our daily lives and most of our conversations.
On several different occasions Wayne has told me that he is just tired of me talking to him about another baby. He is tired of everyone saying something to him about another child. I told him that I would do better about it but we are in the time in our lives when others are just going to mention it. We are in the childbearing years and that is what people our age talk about.
I was talking to my mom Saturday evening about all of this and that I had been going through these battles internally. I had mentioned that if I have to stop talking about another child and be content with Jackson, then why can’t he (Wayne) be content with the house that we have. Why do I always have to hear about his plans for the new house, what he wanted to do, where he wanted to build at, etc. The response? The wise words from Mom? “DON’T WORRY ABOUT IT!” “Don’t worry about any of it. God, in his perfect timing will provide”. “You will kill each other dealing with this mess.” She is so right.
“Don’t worry about it!” filled my head for the rest of the evening. I have consciously made an effort to quit worry about it. I have prayed that God would help me be content and I have continued to thank him for everything he has provided for us and everything additional that he has allowed us to have.
Yesterday I was driving to get Jackson after work. The thoughts and conversations about all this stuff hadn’t come to my brain so far for the day. However, the radio announcer started introducing the next song… “Waiting Room” by Jonny Diaz (lyrics below)… I had heard this song before and listened to some of the words. However, this time I listened to each word and boy, did it hit home.
God definitely has his perfect plan for our lives. Again, just because Wayne and I want a new house and another child doesn’t mean that we need them right now. God knows what He is doing and if we have to wait a little longer, we need to be happy with that. Even if He tells us no for one of them or both, we have to still continue to praise Him for the blessings that he has given us. There is a reason for every decision that He makes and we must strive to be content with those decisions.
Here in this waiting room yearning for You to say go
And though I’m convinced that a yes would be best
This time You’re telling me no
It’s not that I don’t have an answer
It’s just not the one that I’d like
But through this time Lord I must keep in mind
You’re always wiser than I
You have a much better purpose
And You have a far greater plan
And You have a bigger perspective
Cause You hold this world in your hands
The things that I seek are from You
Like the strong healing touch of your hand
But when You say no help me trust even though
There’s a reason I can’t understand
When that miracle comes cause Your answer is yes
I will praise you for all of my days
But when Your wisdom declares that a no is best
I will praise You just the same
And though I’m convinced that a yes would be best
This time You’re telling me no
It’s not that I don’t have an answer
It’s just not the one that I’d like
But through this time Lord I must keep in mind
You’re always wiser than I
You have a much better purpose
And You have a far greater plan
And You have a bigger perspective
Cause You hold this world in your hands
The things that I seek are from You
Like the strong healing touch of your hand
But when You say no help me trust even though
There’s a reason I can’t understand
When that miracle comes cause Your answer is yes
I will praise you for all of my days
But when Your wisdom declares that a no is best
I will praise You just the same
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